doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize