In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
