So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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