My room smells like vodka and shame
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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