who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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