David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize