vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
