i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
