"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
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