shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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