I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
