He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
