i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
