better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize