You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
