idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Randomize
