I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
