the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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