Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
