i just google imaged poop.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Randomize
