Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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