Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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