I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize