Well apparently he's into motor boating.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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