where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize