i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
