she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize