Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
