why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
