Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
