i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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