i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize