My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
