I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
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