what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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