Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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