I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
