Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
