All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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