He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i was born a porn star she said
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
