I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
