what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize