I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
