well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
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