When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize