dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
