It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Less talking, more tequila
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
