my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize