Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
