Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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