you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
