at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
